in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
