After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
