what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize