worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
