His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize