The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
