i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
