i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Randomize
