Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Randomize
