i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
