I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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