$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
