This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
