Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
