I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
