HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
