god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
