I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
COCAINE IS GR8
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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