sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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