I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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