dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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