white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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