Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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