You made me cry and you don't even care
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
