Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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