she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize