We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
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