maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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