He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
im drinking this country out of the recession.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
