And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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