The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
