Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
