you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
