He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Do vagina's smell?
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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