Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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