Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
We need to rekindle our bromance
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
