just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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