everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
i came on her dog
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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