About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize
