i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize
