We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
