I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I am naked and annoyed.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
