Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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