they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Randomize
