you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
