I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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