My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
