If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
