I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
