You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
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